Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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