so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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