then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Holy shit dude........stairs
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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