Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
