I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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