Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
