U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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