come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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