Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Where is the hickey?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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