Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
