It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Randomize
