Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
