some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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