every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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