I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
