I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
The adults are the big ones right?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
