I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
