hell yes lets make some ravioli
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
