The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
