life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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