Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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