I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I party with great urgency now.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
