I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Houston, we have a blender
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
