ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
