butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
