smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
