We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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