@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
