I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
