the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
You're a waste of cheezeits
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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