My brain says no but my pants say off.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
