Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
