she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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