More tranny stories later!
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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