i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
