I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
