I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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