I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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