So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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