But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Little spoons don't ask big questions
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
