physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
