we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
