Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
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