White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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