Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
