Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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