what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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