I don't think brook has ever known best
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
