What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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