its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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